Negative Nancys

Moms have the best advice, don't they? Here's a little advice my mom shared with me a while back to help me deal with negative people:

When dealing with negative people, imagine a bull being in a china cabinet. Scary, isn't it? The negative person is the angry bull and you are a piece of china sitting daintily on the shelf. When released from the gate, that bull is going to do whatever it takes in hopes of bucking you off and breaking you. NEVER LET THEM BREAK YOU!

Here's the deal:

In Purpose Driven Life, Rick Warren refers to these individuals as "EGR" people - "Extra Grace Required." Sound familiar? It should, because "EGR" people are EVERYWHERE! You will encounter them at every school, in every workplace, in every family, and in every church! "EGR" people are those individuals who drain your bucket, start drama, add fuel to the fire and ultimately bring out the worst in you. Simply put, they are bulls in a china cabinet and no matter where you go, there will ALWAYS be bulls! It may be IMPOSSIBLE to get away from them, but it's POSSIBLE to manage them...if we do so with grace! When dealing with these individuals, Warren reminds us: "God put these people in our midst for both their benefit and ours. They are an opportunity for growth and a test of fellowship: Will we love them as brothers and sisters and treat them with dignity?" Will we "kill them with kindness" and allow Christ's light to shine through us, or will we allow our anger to get the best of us? Just as happiness is a choice, we get to choose how we respond to situations! We choose every single day (or at least five days a week...depending on how often we see them) how we will respond to the negative, "Extra Grace Required" people! We should do our best to view the situation as an opportunity to better ourselves and become more like Christ, as mentioned by Viktor Frankl in his quote, “When we can no longer change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” Instead of allowing our sinful nature to win, ask yourself, "What Would Jesus Do?"

Before you respond, be quick to recognize their intentions! Know that you are dealing with an "EGR" person who is trying to knock you off your shelf. There's nothing they would love more than to see you hurt because that's what bulls do - they charge. Pray about the situation, specifically for that person, and then ask God for the right words to say to ensure you respond out of love rather than anger or self-defense! If that doesn't work, remember Thumper on Bambi who wisely noted, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all!" *begins tapping foot on ground*

 

"You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven." Matthew 5:43-45